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To the Nice Lady in Accounts Receivable July 20, 2006

Posted by KG in Back in DC, FS Life.

Dear Swanky Corporate Apartment Company,

First, thanks for setting me up in this fairly ridiculous apartment.  There’s nothing I like more than fake plants, personality-free furniture, and poor water pressure.  But seriously, you can’t beat the location and the arrangements — they’re pretty much just what I needed during this transition.

But there is the small matter of the bill.

I’ve been here for almost a month (well, three weeks) and have been prepared to receive a fairly mammoth bill from you since the 1st.  I reminded you on the 10th.  On the 15th.  And today, the 20th.  And yet you remain reluctant to bill me for the X thousand dollars you rightfully deserve.  Strange — you must be the only company outside of the Seinfeld universe that doesn’t want to get paid.

The normal reaction to this, I suppose, would be “woohoo! free ride!”  Unfortunately, I can’t do that.  Some may enjoy living in free housing, but unfortunately for me there is the small matter of the massive State Department Bureaucracy, a relentless paperwork hungry beast that demands that I, as it’s poor servant, come forth with an offering of vouchers every thirty days.  And those vouchers require invoices.  And those invoices require bills.

So here I am doing the unthinkable — I’m asking you, no, pleading with you to take my money before I run out and spend it all on beef jerky and beer.  You see, as delicious as that sounds, the Department won’t take a receipt from the Sleven as proof of housing.  Or statements of faith that  “no , it really was that expensive.”   Hungry maw demanding paperwork and all that, you know.
Word to your mother,



1. fso GT - July 22, 2006

Hey man, too bad you never made it to Lahore. Hope you can come across the border when you are in India. There’s some fun restaurants I’d like to show you. Keep up the good work.

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